The Bachelor 2016: Episode 6 Recap (Bahamas!)


  (Written by: @JeremyWilson412. For recaps of earlier episodes of The Bachelor go here) Coming up on this week’s Bachelor recap: I give Olivia’s eulogy at her funeral, we say goodbye to the girls who were sent home, and we figure out who the remaining six girls are if they were Read more

#OBY (Others Before Yourself)


First, you had the “Rockabilly Smack You Silly Chicken Chili.” Then, there was “Salato’s Garlicky Potato and Roasted Tomato Soup.” Finally, I brought the “Classic Chicken Noodle Soup with ‘Tis the Season’ Spices.” Those were the three soups I created to win Franklin Road Academy’s First Annual “Souper Bowl,” Read more

Growing Up with Peyton


A few weeks ago, I never thought I'd see Peyton Manning take another snap, much less throw another pass or another touchdown. Much less win another playoff game. Much less defeat Tom Brady, Bill Belichick, and the New England Patriots to win another AFC Championship. (Unbelievably, after all the drama, Peyton Read more

The Bachelor 2016: Episode 5 Recap (Mexico!)


(Written by @JeremyWilson412. For more coverage of this season's The Bachelor, go here) I kept trying to write this recap on Tuesday, but every time I would get in a rhythm, Olivia kept coming in my room and asking if she could steal me for a second. Then I drove Read more

The Bachelor 2016: Episode 4 Recap (VEGAS!)


  (@JeremyWilson412) In this week’s episode of “I’m not that girl you saw earlier, that’s not me, I’m not crazy,” Olivia is still a part of our lives, Amber whiffs on her 3rd chance of reality TV marriage bliss, and a certain girl that looks just like another girl gets dumped Read more

The Bachelor 2016: Episode 3 Recap


(@JeremyWilson412) Hey guys, it’s been a really tough week for me. I got some news that will alter my life forever. I actually just got a call from my doctor and he told me that I have… wait, hold on, Olivia would like to say something. Go ahead, Olivia… “Yeah, sorry Read more

Weekly Posts

The Bachelor 2015: Episode 5 (Passport to New Mexico)

Posted on by Jeremy Wilson in Entertainment, Featured, Misc. TV, Reality Check, Television, TV Reviews, Weekly Posts, Weekly Review | Leave a comment

kelsey evil

 

They’ve done it. They have officially done it.

They found a way to keep us thoroughly entertained while not even having a rose ceremony. We have officially lost our voice as the viewer. The powers that be can now do whatever they want to us.

The episode ended without any finality to it, and we were all ok with it. That’s like the Super Bowl coming down to the last minute and the refs being like, “Ok, that’s enough,” and just calling the game. Maybe not, but it’s like an exciting tennis match going to a 5th set and both players just walking off the court to a standing ovation from the fans.

Is it safe to say that this is our craziest group of girls in recent memory? And not just on The Bachelor, but like any group of at least 10 girls. We have a sociopath, a virgin, a psychopath, someone who’s never had a boyfriend… AND THAT’S JUST ASHLEY I! I used to think that you couldn’t hate someone that you don’t know, but my outlook has changed.

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The Bachelor 2015: Episode 4 (Shameless Plug Week!)

Posted on by Jeremy Wilson in Entertainment, Featured, Misc. TV, Reality Check, Television, TV Reviews, Weekly Posts, Weekly Review | Leave a comment

bachelor mudder

My sincerest apologies for the delay on this post – my real job that actually pays me money got in the way. Don’t worry, I have found a way to prevent this from happening in the future. I set up a Kickstarter page that opens every Monday, so you can login and donate to my cause up until midnight. If I have at least $5,000 raised by midnight, then I will write a recap and post it by noon on Tuesday. If not, then you can expect a recap at some random hour on Wednesday or Thursday.

The Kickstarter page can be found at:

www.kickstarter.com/NoOneCaresEnoughAboutTheseRecapsToPayRealMoneyForThem
/AnyIdiotWithAComputerCanWriteARecap/ForwardSlash/TheWiseGuise
/JeremyMustHaveTooMuchFreeTimeOnHisHands/BackSlash
/HowFarDoIHaveToScrollDownToReadAboutTheActualEpisode/

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The Bachelor 2015: Episode 3 (Costco is for Lovers)

Posted on by Jeremy Wilson in Entertainment, Featured, Misc. TV, Reality Check, Television, TV Reviews, Weekly Posts, Weekly Review | 2 Comments

Bach crew episode 3

Alternate Titles: Chris kissed me and all I got was this lousy t-shirt; or, Jillian’s little black box; or, Big time players make big time plays, and in this case the big time player is Jade.

Dear Friends Who Watched Farmer Chris Kiss Everyone on Television Last Night,

I must confess a few things before we get started…

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The Bachelor 2015: Episode 2 (War on Drugs)

Posted on by Jeremy Wilson in Entertainment, Featured, Misc. TV, Reality Check, Television, TV Reviews, Weekly Posts, Weekly Review | Leave a comment

girls gay

Alternate titles: $500 to the first person who figures out Chris’ taste in women; or, “Chris, this is your life, there are no rules.” –Chris Harrison; or, Chris Soules will kiss you whether you like it or not.

Bachelor watchers and watchettes,

Before we get started today, let’s have a brief moment of silence for Andi and Josh.

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The Bachelor 2015: Premier Breakdown & New Fantasy Game

Posted on by Jeremy Wilson in Entertainment, Featured, Misc. TV, Reality Check, Television, TV Reviews, Weekly Posts, Weekly Review | Leave a comment

Alternate Titles: It’s Britt’s world and we’re all just living in it, or…
It’s drunk Tara’s world and we’re all just living in it, or…
Oh my goodness, one of those girls named her kid Kale!

bach premier group shot

 

Guys and girls,

What a night. I mean, what a night.

I don’t want to fall victim to hyperbole, but that might’ve been the best opening night in the show’s decorated history. They even threw an hour of horrible red carpet coverage at us and that still didn’t weigh down what was a great premier.

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The Bachelor 2015: Scouting the Ladies

Posted on by Jeremy Wilson in Entertainment, Featured, Misc. TV, Reality Check, Television, TV Reviews, Weekly Posts, Weekly Review | Leave a comment

Bach group shot

 

Ladies, Gentlemen (including those who say they just watch it because their wife/girlfriend does), take a moment and say your HELLOS TO SEASON 19 OF THE BACHELOR.

The producers of The Bachelor have dipped into the never-ending well of girls who, and this is just a guess, have so much love to give.

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