Movie Review: Dunkirk


When the credits roll on Christopher Nolan's latest film - a cinematic experience that brings the full scale of the Battle of Dunkirk to the big screen for the first time - the audience is left speechless. Unlike nearly all of his other films, it's not because you're trying Read more

Dream-Casting a Live-Action Little Mermaid for Disney


Perhaps no task is more difficult for a studio than casting a well-known franchise to match the sky-high expectations of fans. From novels to comic books to animated film remakes, Hollywood has had mixed results with the task; some have spent the big bucks to get the demanded stars, Read more

Best Movies of 2016: The 3rd Annual Groucho Awards


Welcome to the Third Annual Groucho Awards! This is my own platform to nominate and award the movies of my choosing, because it seems that far too often, the movies with the biggest campaigns get Oscar nominations and the little guys are left out in the cold. This year Read more

A compelling case that Corinne is six-years-old, and other Bachelor nonsense


  Written by: @jeremywilson412 In the words of Chris Harrison, "Coming up on this week's episode (recap) of The Bachelor..." The ladies receive their first real test, we pause to remember those we lost this week, I present a theory about Corinne that is bulletproof, and we discuss the contenders and pretenders. But Read more

I was not going to write about The Bachelor, but then...


(Written by: @JeremyWilson412) I wasn’t going to write about The Bachelor this year, but then a girl showed up in a shark costume convinced it was a dolphin costume. I wasn’t going to write about The Bachelor this year, but then a girl showed up who hooked up with Nick at Read more

What I Learned about Chris Pratt's Faith


Most of us have loved Chris Pratt since we first met him as Andy Dwyer on Parks and Rec. Then he made his dramatic debuts in Academy Award Best Picture nominees Moneyball and Zero Dark Thirty. The latter revealed that he could be an action star, so it came as no surprise Read more

TV Reviews

The Bachelor 2015: Episode 5 (Passport to New Mexico)

Posted on by Jeremy Wilson in Entertainment, Featured, Misc. TV, Reality Check, Television, TV Reviews | Leave a comment

kelsey evil

 

They’ve done it. They have officially done it.

They found a way to keep us thoroughly entertained while not even having a rose ceremony. We have officially lost our voice as the viewer. The powers that be can now do whatever they want to us.

The episode ended without any finality to it, and we were all ok with it. That’s like the Super Bowl coming down to the last minute and the refs being like, “Ok, that’s enough,” and just calling the game. Maybe not, but it’s like an exciting tennis match going to a 5th set and both players just walking off the court to a standing ovation from the fans.

Is it safe to say that this is our craziest group of girls in recent memory? And not just on The Bachelor, but like any group of at least 10 girls. We have a sociopath, a virgin, a psychopath, someone who’s never had a boyfriend… AND THAT’S JUST ASHLEY I! I used to think that you couldn’t hate someone that you don’t know, but my outlook has changed.

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The Bachelor 2015: Episode 4 (Shameless Plug Week!)

Posted on by Jeremy Wilson in Entertainment, Featured, Misc. TV, Reality Check, Television, TV Reviews | Leave a comment

bachelor mudder

My sincerest apologies for the delay on this post – my real job that actually pays me money got in the way. Don’t worry, I have found a way to prevent this from happening in the future. I set up a Kickstarter page that opens every Monday, so you can login and donate to my cause up until midnight. If I have at least $5,000 raised by midnight, then I will write a recap and post it by noon on Tuesday. If not, then you can expect a recap at some random hour on Wednesday or Thursday.

The Kickstarter page can be found at:

www.kickstarter.com/NoOneCaresEnoughAboutTheseRecapsToPayRealMoneyForThem
/AnyIdiotWithAComputerCanWriteARecap/ForwardSlash/TheWiseGuise
/JeremyMustHaveTooMuchFreeTimeOnHisHands/BackSlash
/HowFarDoIHaveToScrollDownToReadAboutTheActualEpisode/

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The Bachelor 2015: Episode 3 (Costco is for Lovers)

Posted on by Jeremy Wilson in Entertainment, Featured, Misc. TV, Reality Check, Television, TV Reviews | 2 Comments

Bach crew episode 3

Alternate Titles: Chris kissed me and all I got was this lousy t-shirt; or, Jillian’s little black box; or, Big time players make big time plays, and in this case the big time player is Jade.

Dear Friends Who Watched Farmer Chris Kiss Everyone on Television Last Night,

I must confess a few things before we get started…

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The Bachelor 2015: Episode 2 (War on Drugs)

Posted on by Jeremy Wilson in Entertainment, Featured, Misc. TV, Reality Check, Television, TV Reviews | Leave a comment

girls gay

Alternate titles: $500 to the first person who figures out Chris’ taste in women; or, “Chris, this is your life, there are no rules.” –Chris Harrison; or, Chris Soules will kiss you whether you like it or not.

Bachelor watchers and watchettes,

Before we get started today, let’s have a brief moment of silence for Andi and Josh.

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The Bachelor 2015: Premier Breakdown & New Fantasy Game

Posted on by Jeremy Wilson in Entertainment, Featured, Misc. TV, Reality Check, Television, TV Reviews | Leave a comment

Alternate Titles: It’s Britt’s world and we’re all just living in it, or…
It’s drunk Tara’s world and we’re all just living in it, or…
Oh my goodness, one of those girls named her kid Kale!

bach premier group shot

 

Guys and girls,

What a night. I mean, what a night.

I don’t want to fall victim to hyperbole, but that might’ve been the best opening night in the show’s decorated history. They even threw an hour of horrible red carpet coverage at us and that still didn’t weigh down what was a great premier.

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The Bachelor 2015: Scouting the Ladies

Posted on by Jeremy Wilson in Entertainment, Featured, Misc. TV, Reality Check, Television, TV Reviews | Leave a comment

Bach group shot

 

Ladies, Gentlemen (including those who say they just watch it because their wife/girlfriend does), take a moment and say your HELLOS TO SEASON 19 OF THE BACHELOR.

The producers of The Bachelor have dipped into the never-ending well of girls who, and this is just a guess, have so much love to give.

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