I admit it: I’m a Southern Gentleman. In this day and age, that can be taboo to admit. I would say the vast majority of young males I confront fall far from the definition. And in the modern era, it’s easy to see why.
We’re a society built on impulse. Before we even know what the app does for our phone, we’re already downloading it. Most guys find themselves carrying ladies to the bedroom when they barely know their names. They think the digital world should operate on their time table and get quickly angered when they don’t get an immediate response through text or social media (“My Instagram pic only got 2 likes in one hour? Time to take that sucker down!”).
Oh yes, and they don’t worry about sending out resumes. Just wait for mom or dad to connect me with that job interview, where I’ll leisurely brisk in wearing the “nice Sunday clothes” mom got me for Christmas, expecting to land that hot-paying job with a diploma and stained bow-tie I wore in college.
If you find yourself in any of the aforementioned positions, now is the time to change trajectory. It’s not only these things though; most older Southern guys are labeled as gentlemen incorrectly. Just because you attended the University of Alabama, were in a fraternity, and go back to all the home football games with your plastic surgeried-to-hell wife does not a gentleman make.
I’ve decided to make a guide to resolve some of these issues. I expect intense debate. I also expect many young males to just roll their eyes and say, “Eh, this is some GQ-reading, metrosexual liberal Northerner telling me how to live.” If you guessed this, the only thing you got right was the GQ-reading part. And I don’t even read it every month.
So, let’s begin, shall we? In this installment, I’d like to start with three excuses you’ll often find made by Southern males that are not things true gentlemen would say.